Why I have a hard time loving people in Christ.

So if you are reading this blog or follow me, you're probably thinking "Oh Lord, how could she not love others? I do all the time." Well let me explain myself, us women at times run off of emotion. I run off of emotion mixed with logic, I've been a work in progress with self-control, the story of Esther is a great one for that. But, when I think love, I don't think emotion, I think of care and an action that can only be carried out in pure selflessness.
 Now, I have problems with looking at my convictions and looking at others thinking why isn't God bothering you? It sounds kind of harsh, but its true in how we feel at times. Its hard not taking your convictions and placing them over someones' head and asking, "How come you are doing this and if I do it God gives me a deep gut twinge?"
 People tend to know how to push the buttons! And when they do the "love" goes away and most of the time it loses respect. But ladies, we know how it feels if someone "B-rates" your husband or says something about you. It kills you not to say or do something for revenge. That is not a feeling of love. So when others do you wrong what is your answer to the problem?
 Loving someone in Christ is supposed to be likened to how Christ loves us, unconditionally, yes people...when they are acting ugly towards you, God expects us to be the opposite. It is not EASY!! I have had people test the Christ-like love, and believe me I struggle. But, being married has made it easy to love as Christ, toward my husband and family. But, with strangers or even Church members it becomes strained and a wedge between stewards.
  When Christ looks at me He doesn't see a big ol' nasty sinner, He sees His child. It's a wonderful thought and very humbling. Yet, we have a hard time looking at others that way. So the bottom line of all of this is, when others mock or ignore basic Bible principles I feel like shutting them out and building a wedge between us. But, God doesn't ask we be isolated, but prayed up so that we can be good examples to a lost and dying world.
So am I the only one with the struggle of giving authentic love to others?